The Dream

I had a dream the other night. It was no ordinary dream. None of my dreams are though. But this one was especially different. Quite disturbing to say the least. It disturbed me to the point that I got up at 3:30 a.m. and pondered emailing a very special mentor to get her insight. I knew that I had to write it down so that I wouldn't forget it. I tried to tell Sue about it but it was useless since she was in her own dream world and unwilling to leave. So, I booted up and began to write. Here is a portion of the email I sent:



"The reason I feel so disturbed by this dream is because of its deep spiritual nature and how it all ties into my life, especially since I have to share my testimony publicly for the first time on Thursday with WRAP (a support group for women who have been victims of domestic violence). Of course, as all of my dreams are, it's a bit crazy and doesn't make sense at times. However, that's the strange part of it.....the weird stuff actually does seem to make some sort of sense to me in a way but most of it is just weird. Anyhow... It's not often that a dream has an impact on me like this but this one really has chill bumps going on. I want to write it down before I forget.



From what I can recall, I was driving down the road and Robin (a previous mentor relationship that fell through) was in the car with me. I was taking her home from something. I think Stephanie (my old best friend) was with her. A car pulled up beside us as we approached Robin's house and it was filled with children. At some point, I think Robin brought up the topic of abuse and got me discussing it with the children and what abuse is and how to recognize and avoid it etc... I think she had falsly told me that the children were abused by their father just to see what kind of reaction she would get. She kept asking me questions and giving me situations and kept egging me on to tell the kids how to deal with those situations. I spoke the truth from what my Christian and secular counselors have told me. Then she told the woman in the car she could leave. Robin began laughing as we entered her home. Stephanie seemed to be unaware as to why. So, Robin quite proudly pulled a tape recorder from under her shirt and told me that she got it all on tape and she was going to prove that I was crazy. She told me that she was going to play the tape to my counselors. Of course I wasn't concerned about the tape. I was just hurt that she did this. I thought she just wanted to be with me. I was so broken hearted while she pranced and danced. As she made some kind of transfer to a print out, I asked for a copy for myself to listen to and she said, "Suuuuuure, I'll be glad to make you one!" and she did.



Then it was as if her home was filled with all the old church people and it became some type of courtroom where I was basically being condemned. Then the scene changed again to a place where it was like a Mary Kay type party and they wanted to humiliate me......the church ladies. They tried to get me to sit where there was no seat but I sat where I wanted to. Then they threw flour at me as a joke. So I tried to beat them to the punchline the next time by throwing the next batch at myself before they had a chance. Then I said better yet, let me throw it at you! Well, at first the lady got mad, but then I laughed and threw some cake at another lady and she also laughed and it turned into this huge food fight and we had a blast and it was as if we were all reconciled when it was over. I even woke myself up laughing.



Then there was a weird snippet of another dream that I had when I fell back asleep. I don't remember it well but it involved Northbrook and the youth and this huge mansion with a sick old lady who kept throwing up........Oh we were watching a movie with the youth at some ladies' house. It was a weird movie about people being splatted on the street but they weren't real people. They were dummies stuffed with milk. Some guys were playing a practical joke...okay so that had nothing to do with anything (or maybe it does) Anyhow, after the movie was over, I couldn't find my way out of the house, it was like a big maze but then it tied into my previous dream........



I found Sue and decided to let her hear the tape that Robin made but instead of hearing it, all of a sudden, we were back at the scene reliving the experience but watching it instead like in "The Christmas Carol" Okay, I'm starting to get creeped out. We were in Robin's house and all of a sudden we were really in her house and she knew somebody was there so we were trying to hide but she caught us. Sue tried to leave but I said "NO"! This time In the dream, Robin was pregnant. I told Sue that she had a demon in her and I had to get it out. I am getting chill bumps. It's dark and cool in here and I'm the only one up....



Sue was walking around praying out any evil as I quietly followed Robin praying for the demon to leave her. She began to notice my presence so I felt it necessary to lay my hands on her head from behind. At that point she turned around and looked at me.......ohhhhhhhh the chills are going up and down my body as I recall this! I laid my left hand on her very pregnant abdomen and my right hand on the back of her head still trying to cast out the demon and it wasn't working. Robin said nothing. I turned her head to make her look me in the eyes and finally, I said in a strong, demanding voice...."In the name of Jesus......" and it was as If I heard her thoughts from somewhere deep inside tell me to say "plea the blood"..........



I struggled so hard because I couldn't talk but I did it......I barely got the words to form but I managed to say, "By the blood of Jesus I command you to flee!"



This is the scary part!!!!!!!! Ohhhhh it's like Nightmare on Elm Street!!!!!!! (What is up with that Movie? I don't even watch that stuff!)



Her face turned red, her eyes became beady and rolled in the back of her head, her hair turned white and her face looked old and she began to look like a goat in the face. That was the point when I became so frightened that I woke up. Now I am so creeped out that I don't think I can go back to sleep.





So, that's the dream. There's more to the story. It seems God answered prayer through the dream. Although it all seems crazy and doesn't make sense, when held against the backdrop of my life.......it makes perfect sense. My friend to whom I sent the email is a very wise woman. I didn't know it but, God had been preparing her to receive that email and it didn't come as a surprise. She was ready and blessed me to the bottom of my soul with her reply. I never expected God to answer me that way but isn't it just like God to surprise us when we least expect it where we least expect it, how we least expect it.......just because we pray..... expecting? Thursday night I will be speaking to a group of very broken, fragile women. I want to display God's love and grace to them the way it has been so present in my life. Pray for me.



Psalm 5:3

"In the morning, O LORD , you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation."