Thursday, April 27, 2006

Stupid Question of the Day - The Compilation

Over the years in retail, I have listened to a fair amount of "stupid questions". I know, I know, some say "the only stupid question is the one that isn't asked". Yeah, uh-huh, whatever.

I say "the only questions that are stupid are the ones that are asked before thinking".

So, borrowing from past posts, I present to you a compilation of some of the "Stupid Questions of the Day":

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Customer: "I don't know the name of the song or who sings it, but it starts with a C"

Me: "The title of the song starts with a 'C'?"

Customer: "Yes"

Me: (not really believing that this person is standing there waiting for me to magically announce I know exactly what song they are looking for) "I think I need a little more to go on."

Customer: "Will your computer search for songs starting with the letter 'C'?"

Me: (still not really believing that this person is really going to search for all songs that begin with the letter "C") "Yes it will and it will pull up at least a million songs that begin with the letter 'C'".

The customer proceeds to begin his search for the song on the computer. He started with C.

I just don't understand how people like this manage to exist successfully in society.

**UPDATE** The rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrest of the story.....

After the man searched on the computer for about twenty minutes, I went over to "check" on him. He said "I REMEMBERED THE SONG" and it is something like "Can't Get Enough of Your Love". I said "Oh, that's Barry White. I found a Barry White CD with that song on it, played it for him on the listening point and he verified "that's it!"

Hmpf! I really thought it was going to be THIS!

Yay. Happy Ending.

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A person enters the store, again hears music playing overhead, sees that we sell CDs and asks "What are you using to play the music?"

The answer:

"uhhhhhh, a CD player"

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One of my co-workers shared with me yesterday the "stupid question of the month" that came from a customer.

I said "of the month?" and she said "it's too stupid to be the question of the day, it's definately for the entire month...maybe even more!" LOL

So what is the question?

Well, here's some background for those reading this that may not know what I do for a living. I manage an FYE store, For Your Entertainment. I sell CDs, DVDs and games. I LOVE IT!

Anyway, when one walks into the store which has a giant sign at the front that says FYE - MUSIC and MOVIES, the first thing one comes in contact with is the new releases for the week. Music CDs on one side, Movie DVDs on the other.

A customer walks into the store, with the new Jimmy Eat World CD blaring throughout the store, picks up a CD off the Top 20 endcap and asks (drumroll please.........................................)

Is this a music store?


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This wasn't really a stupid question, but it was unusual:

After one of those very hectic days where it was difficult to even catch ones breath, we finally had a bit of a breather. About ten minutes before we closed my associate and I happened to be at the counter when a man approached. We asked what we could help him with and he asked "Do you have any Scandinavian imports?". Danielle turned to look at me and we both started cracking up! The guy had no clue why that question was so funny, so I had to explain that we've just had a real interesting night and someone asking about Scandinavian imports was the LAST thing we expected! LOL

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At one time I was hiring for an assistant manager. These are some questions I get from people interested in work...mind you, these in particular is for a management position:

  1. What does management do?
  2. What is retail?
  3. What is a keyholder?
  4. What does "prior experience" mean?
*rolls eyes* If one has to ask these questions, why are they applying for a managment position?

I answered one young man's question "what does management do?" by listing things like "inventory management, loss prevention, human resources, training, merchandising, etc." He looked at me like I was speaking an entirely different language and then said "oh, I don't think I'm ready for that." I said "probably not".


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And we can't forget the questions that we get a few times each and every week:

"What time do you open?" (which in itself isn't a stupid question)

"In another 40 minutes"

"Oh, well, do you have....? how many do you have? Can you hold that for me? How much is it?"

If we open in another 40 minutes, we are NOT OPEN NOW!

And for Ticketmaster, oh, it causes the eye roll DAILY:

"I'm calling about tickets for the show."

"We are a Ticketmaster outlet, a walk-in service only, so we do not answer Ticketmaster questions over the phone. I can give you the Ticketmaster number if you would like."

"Well, do you have tickets for the show?"

"We are a walk-in service only, I can give you the Ticketmaster number."

"I just need to know how much they are."

"I can not look up Ticketmaster information for phone customers. We are a walk-in service only."

"Well, I live 40 minutes away and don't want to drive all that way to find out there are no tickets available.

"You can call Ticketmaster directly. I will give you their number. You see, I could say 'yes, there are tickets available in such and such seats' and you could still drive all that way and by the time you get here those tickets could be gone.'"

"Ok, well, give me Ticketmaster's number."


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So, there you have it! A compilation of actual questions I have been asked as a retailer. Retail is fun!

So, now for one of my favorite all time quotes:
"Ignorance is curable, stupid is forever."

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