Monday, September 09, 2002


I just have to share with you my worship experience this morning!

God is so good to me.

It has been stressful at work because I am working many hours trying to cover shifts now that I am short-staffed. I am down to a core group of people and they are great workers and I am trying hard to keep morale up up up! So far we all have smiles still! Hopefully I will be able to get some good people hired in this week. It's not easy to find good ones these days. I needed today off!

Worship yesterday was awesome! Unique. Very different and the Spirit is alive and moving! Started with music of course. Chuck, our administrative pastor who leads/organizes worship, explained that while we worship today we will have to opportunity to take communion. The four corners of the church each had tables set up with the elements. He explained that the "stage" (altar) was available and so was the PLT (pastoral leadership team) if we needed/wanted to them to pray with us. This was new for Northbrook Church. I hadn't seen them do this before, at least not in this way.

Chuck reminded us all about 911 and the anniversary. You'd have to be deaf, dumb, and blind not to know the significance of 911. He said we have chosen to honor our God and worship Him today, and remember Him on the anniversary of the tragic event. He said a lot better than my paraphrase, but you get the point. Then we heard scripture that told of God's mercies. God's almighty power. God's love for us. Then we would sing. The music was a mixture of old hymns and newer stuff, all very thought provoking stuff. All glorified Him! As people felt led, we went to the tables to partake in communion with our God, or to the altar to offer praises/prayer. There were no lines, only a few people would be there at a time. It was almost "private". It was so cool. To "do this in rememberance of Me". It was an awesome sight to see today. Awesome to feel. The music in the air. Scripture being read aloud. Hands raised in praise. Tears trickling down the face of one of the male singers as he led the song "Give me Jesus" Take away my world, just "give me Jesus", as his strong tenor voice cracked with emotion. I was so moved. The music continued on and on. I didn't want it to end.

I sat at my seat. Katie had already gone up to receive the bread. I sat and struggled with my bitterness. It won't let me go. My resentment toward that old church of hers and her ex, it just eats me. Katie is the only one who knows my struggle, I have shared with you some of it, but it is really rooted deep and has been hindering my relationship with God for awhile now. Today I felt moved. Walt, my SaLT group leader is a member of the PLT. I love him and his wife Karen dearly. They are great God-fearing people and so wise. WaLT was assisting at one of the communion tables. Unfortunately, it was the one furthest from me. I wanted him to pray with me about my bitterness. I asked Katie if she would go with me. So, she came. We both walked from our 3rd row seat on the right side of the church, completely around the back and to the front of the left side of the church. I grabbed Karen, Walt's wife, on the way to come pray too. I confessed my bitterness to Walt and Karen and Walt had the four of us on our knees, holding hands, praying to my God for me. It was so beautiful. I have tears now. I felt so loved. I feel loved. I pray God hears that prayer and helps rid me of this root that is swallowing me up. I felt relieved a bit that I shared my sin. I took of the cup, the bread. Walt said to me on my way back, "why didn't you come to me sooner? We could have been praying for that all along?" I answered "Well, now you can pray about my pride problem!" LOL It was an amazing experience at worship today. This was all in the first 20 minutes of church!

Paul, our pastor, gave the message. It was about how God did not make the 911 thing happen. He did not allow it to happen. It happened. Tragedy happens in a sinful world. The sermon was about how God can take what happens and use it for good. It was a very good message. I took so many notes I ran out of space!

We ended with "A Mighty Fortress". It was powerful. I am not much into hymns, and that one never appealed to me at all, but I know that the way the church sang today, it glorified Him. Solo guitar and all of our voices. Every verse. Last verse was all a cappella. Simple. All voices singing to Him. It was moving. He smiled on our little church in Humboldt, TN today.

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