A few months ago, WaLT, my SaLT Group leader asked me to consider teaching a class, basically subbing for him so he can have a break. I said no.
Who am I to teach the Word? I told him that I couldn't because my heart was not right. I have been dealing with some spiritual issues that were detrimental to my relationship with God lately, nothing that was of huge concern, but that my heart was just not in a state that would be conducive to learning the Word enough to teach it. I would feel too hypocritical.
Walt told me that sometimes preparing to teach gets one in the Word and God uses that to help correct an issue like I described. I simply discarded what he had to say at the time.
A few weeks ago, I was feeling better, Walt asked me again to take one of his classes. I still said no. But, eventually, after numerous pleas said yes when he asked again.
The past few weeks I've spent in the Word preparing to lead on John 11. It was an experience and made me study a bit differently than I have before. Usually, when I study, I'm praying for God to reveal Himself to me through His Word. While that is still my prayer, I was also asking Him to guide me and reveal Himself to others through His Word, and chosen instrument, which was to be me. Ugh. The pressure!
I had, and have, so many thoughts running through my head. I have thoughts like I'm not qualified to teach, I'm a hypocrite, I'm encouraged, scared, why me?
Well, it's over now. My first time leading/teaching SaLT is over.
Things seemed to go smoothly. The class responded well to my questions and leading, and I don't think I taught any false doctrine. LOL I feel humbled, privileged, excited, challenged, relieved, anxious, etc. all at the same time. It is such an important responsibility to share the Word with others. I want to make sure I get it right, but it is comforting to know, that if I had said something incorrect or out of line, I have brothers and sisters in Christ who love me enough to correct me and encourage me. I received a lot of encouragement today, thanks be to God.
God is amazing...He uses even me.
-Sue
Sunday, August 13, 2006
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